I was thinking today...

and trying to pinpoint WHY this weight loss endevor seems to be my last.  As you know from my first post, I have tried just about every diet or diet pill under the sun.  I've some success with some and not so much with others...but everything always ended up the same...I would stop the diet and I would gain EVERYTHING I lost and then some back.  I was the typical YO-YO dieter.  Lose some then gain some and more...lose some and gain some....back and forth. 

Most of the diets I just got sick of eating that way....the one that I had the most success with but despised the way I ate was the Atkins Diet.  I love meat.  I'm such a carnivore...if a meal didn't contain some sort of meat than it wasn't a meal.  But the Atkins Diet goes way too far.  After about 4 months and 50 lbs lost I couldn't do it anymore.  I couldn't eat all that meat.  It's just not good for you!  The first few weeks off the diet I didn't eat much meat at all.  I went back to veggies and fruits, the produce that I had missed sooo much while eating that way.

But eventually, I went right back to eating my old way...processed foods, meats some dairy.  Junk food galore.  Chips, cakes, cookies.  I think I should have bought stock in Little Debbie.  It was nothing for me to go to Walmart and pick up a couple of boxes of Little Debbie cakes and eat at least a box on my way home from the store.  I only live about 5 minutes from Walmart!  I would hide the other box and not let my husband know I had purchased it and when he was in the shower or when he left to run an errand I would rush to them and stuff a bunch in my mouth!  I would do the same thing with Donuts or the Deli. 

Anyway...back to WHY I think this weight loss endevor will be my last - The simple fact that I am scared TO DEATH to become diebetic.  My family - both sides - have long histories of diebeties in the family.  My dad's side is mostly juvenile diebeties.  I have had too many aunts, uncles and cousins die from complications of diebeties.  The most memorable was my Uncle Lewis.  My sister and I grew up with him around.  My dad and he were the closest in age and were really close as far as brothers go.  We would spend alot of time at his house or he at ours.  When he divorced from his wife he spent even more time at our place.  He had a standing invitation to dinner and he was usually there right with us every night after work.

The first time I saw him fill his needle up and give himself a shot in the stomach made me cringe!  I couldn't watch after that and always looked away when he would pull out his little pack. 

I visit the doctor regularly because of my family history and while I was growing up I got blood tests done about every 6 months and the number they looked at most was the glucose.  They always came back OK.  When I got out on my own I still checked in with the doctor and go frequent blood tests just to make sure and even as my weight climbed my glucose levels stayed the same. 

So I guess I didn't see my weight as such a problem as long as I was diebetic.  That was my epiphiny this morning.  I was talking to my sister online and she's diebetic.  We were talking about her upcoming doctors appt and blood panels and all I could do was think "God, I'm so glad I don't have diebeties." and it hit me!  I've been heavy for 15+ years and have never had a diebeties scare until this last blood panel.  I always have thought about diebeties in the back of my mind but as long as my glucose levels were good what difference did it make that I was overweight other than I feel terrible about myself and hate being stared at as I enter a room. 

This is why I know in my heart without a doubt this will be the last time I try to lose weight.  I am making a lifestyle change and once my body has healed itself I won't need to worry about these things any longer.  I enjoy eating this way and in some ways it's just easier.  I can throw a bunch of veggies and some fruit into the juicer and be on my way. 

I've been on a lot of diets and I can honestly say I've never been this at peace while on one.  I don't feel deprived or starved.  I eat when I get hungry and I don't worry about calories.  That's the most awesome thing about eating this way.  You don't have to count calories or fat or carbs.  Everything is whole and natural.  I read labels quite a bit and don't buy anything with added sugar or anything that has something in that I can't pronounce.  It's just a completely different mindset than I have ever had while on a 'diet'.

I just wish I could get the husband as gungho on it as I am.  I made the Veggie Chili last week and he did eat that...I made some more last night and he didn't complain.  But he's still consuming a bunch of crap that he thinks is fine for him like the banana bread with a cup and  a half of sugar or the berry pie with 2 cups of sugar and crisco laden crusts.  It may be homemade and home cooking but it's not healthy.  He also won't give up meat.  I have had about 4 ounces of chicken in the last month and I don't miss meat.  It's really odd but I know it's not that good for us and I don't miss not eating it even tho it was a staple in my diet for so many years. 

Today was a break thru for me.  I hope that you have gotten to that same place or that you will soon. 

It's a wonderful place to be!

Ciao for now

The days just get away from me...

I know it's been awhile since I posted last.  I've had a follow up doctors appt and some turmoil since the 23rd. 

I went to my doctor's appt on Monday and he was very pleased with my progress even tho I don't feel as tho I lost enough in the two weeks I've been juicing.  I weighed in at 12 lbs lighter than the first appt 3 weeks earlier and I didn't start my juice fast until the 12th which puts me at 6 lbs a week.  I've only had ONE day where I've done nothing but juice.  Every other day I've eaten something but it's always something thats on the juicing list OR it's plant strong. 

I made some killer veggie chili over the weekend and it R O C K E D!

Here's the recipe:
1 Sweet Onion
1 Green Bell Pepper
3 or 10 cloves of garlic - suit to your tastes.
Veggie Broth - to saute
2 cans Black Beans
2 cans Garbonzo
2 cans Kidney Beans
2 cups of corn
2 cans of diced tomatoes - I used Hunts spicey fire roasted diced tomatoes
2.5 cups of water or veggie broth
2 cans of sliced mushrooms (optional) the mushrooms gives it a little chewy texture that kind of mimics meat.
1 tbls of Cumin
1 tbls of Chili powder
(I probably used more than that because I don't measure much of anything, I just put stuff in til it looks good)

Dice the onion, bell pepper and garlic into a pan and saute in veggie broth ( you can use 2 tbls of vegetable oil but I prefer broth) until onions are translucent - about 5 minutes

Add all other ingredients except for the corn and bring to a boil.  Turn heat down and simmer covered for about 30 minutes.  Add the corn and simmer for another 10 mintues. 

Serve and enjoy!  You can top the chili with sour cream or cheese but that does add calories and it was mighty fine without it. 

I ate this every night for the past 4 nights.  It was absolutely wonderful each time! 

I just can't NOT eat.  I juice in the morning and for lunch but for dinner I have to have something and I'm ok with that as long as the weight keeps coming off albeit slower than if I was only juicing.  I had to find what worked for me and this is it.  You might be different.  You might be able to JUST juice and there is nothing wrong with that.  I've been doing so many things wrong all these years and it finally feels that I'm doing something right now!

Donuts. Really?

One of my co-workers birthday is this weekend.  He is not in on the weekend and today was his last day for the week, so we decorated for him and bought him a dozen donuts.  His absolute favorite thing in the world is donuts. 

I passed those donuts a dozen times without reaching into the box and plucking one out.  I was really getting weak towards closing time and I was never so happy to see him leave and take those f**king donuts home!

I juiced for breakfast and lunch.  I added Beets to both and were really good!

I just juiced for dinner and it's pretty good.  Spinich, cucumber, lemon, kiwi and apples.  It's supposed to have mint as well but I don't have any.

I'm thinking tonight will be ok and I'll not cheat.  Last night I had a couple of ears of corn.  It's just so difficult when the husband is eating real food and at least it was corn.

He made banana bread yesterday and I just wanted to kill him but I've refraind from eating the bread or killing the husband.

Today has been an ok day as far as feeling hungry.  It's almost 8 and I just made my dinner juice and I'm not really that hungry...just want to chew because it's a big bad habit to eat when I get home.

Only 4 more days until my doctors appt.  I have been afraid to step on the scale since Monday because of all my cheating :(  I'm really hoping I haven't gained weight

Only time will tell.

Ciao for now

Discouraged

I'm getting discouraged.  I get up in the morning and I'm all gungho to start the day and start juicing....then lunch comes and I have to go home and juice...then by the time I get home I'm done.  I have no more willpower :( its just gone.

I had a can of chicken and rice soup last night and tonight and didn't juice for dinner at all.

I went to buy produce and forgot carrots so now I can't have my favorite juice for breakfast and I'm starved.  *sigh*

I'm going to continue to trudge forward but I'm really struggling.  I broke three nails today and the husband and I got into a fight and all I wanted to do was go buy some little debbie cakes.

Tomorrow is a new day.  Wish me luck

Day 1 - yes you read right!

AYE!  Sunday and Monday were my undoing.  This is extremely difficult to do when you have a person in the house who absolutely refuses to cooperate! 

Sunday I ate some of the chili my husband had made but I picked out the meat so that I was basically only getting tomatoes, beans and onions...THEN I find out that he also used BBQ sauce and KETCHUP in the chili!!!

Yesterday I had lunch we a couple of very dear friends.  They are helping me sort out a few things in my life and were very gracious to pay for lunch.  We went to a local Chinese restaurant and I ordered something off the lunch menu to keep costs down.  It was broccolli Chicken. Very good but I know I blew it.

So last night when I got hungry I had an apple and some peanut butter and a handful of granola cereal and went to sleep.

SO this morning I got up with a renewed vigor and juiced my very favorite Carrot/Apple/Ginger drink and drank it down pretty fast!  And I've had a couple of glasses of ice water.  I'm getting ready to go home and juice my lunch but the other girls are lunching right now and their meals smell incredible!  My stomach is gurgling just smelling their food!

I need to hole myself up in place where I'm all by myself and nobody can cook anything in my kitchen and I would be so much better at this.

So far I've not cheated today.  I just have to keep reminding myself its all for me!

What?!

So today is the morning of Day 8 and today is my official weigh in for my fast.  I stepped on the scale this morning and I weighed in at 270.3!  That is a loss of 8.9 lbs overall this week! 

I'm very excited that I lost almost 9 lbs this week even with all the 'cheating'!

Even when I 'cheat' I try to stay to the list of acceptable foods, it's just that I need to chew! 

I didn't do very well today.  The husband made some chili for lunch and it was just divine.  It was all natural ingredients except for the meat but I picked that out and just ate the beans, corn, tomatoes and onions.  It just felt good to eat something hot. 

I did juice this morning for breakfast and I will juice tomorrow.  I have a lunch date with a friend tomorrow but I will juice for dinner and then start fresh on Tuesday again. 

I feel so bloated after eating so much soup.  Its uncomfortable really.  I used to do this all the time and its something I have to stop.

Tomorrow is another day at which to succeed.

Ciao

I am NOT a Cheater!

it's the morning of Day 7 and I have to tell you a little secret...I didn't cheat at all yesterday (Day 6).

I have cheated every other day...usually not by much but one night I ate 2 peaches, the next an ear of corn, the next some peanuts, one night I even cooked and ate a veggie burger!

I know, the foods weren't bad for me but they weren't on the juice fast. 

I feel really good about the fact that I didn't cheat yesterday and I'm feeling pretty good overall. 

I have to break out the treadmill since the weather today is terrible. 

I have to go buy more produce too.  I'm pretty much out of most of the stuff I use most.  I figured it out and buying at the Farmstand has allowed me to juice for about $10 a day or a little less.  I still have some produce left in the fridge.  That's doable for me.  The husband isn't happy because I haven't been buying regular groceries but it wouldn't kill him to eat healthier.

I might update later.

For now Ciao and Happy Juicing!

Day 6

Ok.  So I was going to wait until Sunday to weigh myself but then I started thinking about it and wanted to know how much I lost on the 5 days.  So I stepped on the scale...I'm down to 272.9! That's a loss of 6.3 lbs! I will take that and I'm extending another 5 days.  Imagine what I can lose if I DON'T cheat?!

Day 5

Today is Day 5 and it was pretty busy.  I got up and made my breakfast juice and then I was out for the majority of the day.  I got home and drank a couple of large glasses of ice water then made a juice for a really late lunch.  I didn't have any kale so I kind of improvised.  The juice I made was pretty good:  A big handful of spinich, 1 cucumber, 2 radishes, 2 apples, 4 celery stalks, a large bell pepper and a splash of pepper.  It was really good.  It smelled bad but tasted good.  I'm glad I have a cup that has a screw on lid to keep the smell down!

Tomorrow I go back to work. I really don't want to but that's another story. Tomorrow will prove interesting.  I have to make enough juice for lunch and a snack after making my breakfast juice.

Obviously, I'm extending my juice fast.  I've decided 5 more days is doable.  I at least hit my first goal which I was worried about. 

Happy Juicing!  3 more days til I weigh in.  I think I'll start adding some exercise next week.  I'm feeling pretty energetic.

Ciao

Day 4....Really?

Today is day 4 and it seems like a lifetime.  I cheated a bit last night.  Nothing too bad just a handful of shelled peanuts.  I just had to chew! 

I haven't cheated today and I'm really hoping that I don't.  I'm just now drinking my lunch juice.  I got up late because I am still off of work and I didn't drink my breakfast juice until almost Noon:30.

But it's almost like I don't need as much juice as I did the first couple of days.  I have to make myself drink the juice because I'm not hungry. 

When I get back to work Friday this is going to be difficult.  My juicer doesn't make much juice and it takes forever so I have to make the juice in advance and take it to work with me.  I don't want to skip 'meals' as I will probably pig out and break my fast when I get home if I do.

I'm sure I will figure something out tho.  Maybe I can make my breakfast juice and clean up and then make my lunch juice right after.  That's probably going to be the easiest way to do it.  I don't want to come home for 1/2 hour lunch and spend all my time cutting up veggies to go into my juicer. 

I really resisted the urge to step on the scale this morning!  I'm not feeling anything in my clothes yet tho. :(  maybe it's all the cheating? 

No cheating today!

Ok...Still feeling good Gonna keep this party going!

Day 3

I am super excited!  This is much easier than I thought it was going to be.  I do feel like I have to chew but I just stick a piece of gum in my mouth and that helps with that.

I am feeling a bit a hungry but I know that's because I'm not juicing enough.  So, I'm going to remedy that today.  I'm going to juice extra juice at lunch so I have a snack.  Cleaning my juicer 3x a day is a pain and I really don't want to clean it any more than that.

I'm getting the hang of it tho.  The first day was not real good because I hadn't used my juicer before but now I know that after about a lb of produce I have to 'shake' it to get to drop all the pulp into the bin. 

I'm going to start my red worm composter today.  I got all the stuff or it except for the worms yesterday.  I just have to set it up and let it sit for about a week then add the worms.  I think it's going to be super cool to make some mulch and juice.  Even after I stop the fast I will continue to juice once or twice a day.  It is just the healthy thing to do. 

I haven't weighed myself this morning because I want to wait until Sunday but it was tough not stepping up there. I want to see results Dammit!!!! :)

I woke up this morning not hungry again, which again is odd because I was pretty hungry last night when I went to bed. I think I need to start drinking herbel tea before bed..it's something that I've not done yet.

If anything exciting happens during the day I'll be back to update this post otherwise I'll see you tomorrow!

Ciao for now - I'm on my way to a healthier me!

Day 2 ... let's get this party started!

Day 2 is here. 

Last night I was SOOOOO hungry.  My daughter and I went out last night to watch the meteor shower and I should have made another juice but instead I ate 2 donut ... peaches!  I don't feel too bad about it tho since it was a fruit that was on the list and it made me feel alot better.

This morning I woke and didn't feel hungry...which is odd because I am always starving when I first wake up.

I weighed myself...I know I shouldn't have but I just couldn't help it and I'm down to 275.6 - that is 3.6 lbs!  I'll take it.  I won't weigh myself now until Sunday morning which will be my scheduled weigh in day until I get to where I want to be. 

I also realized that I didn't post a picture yesterday.  I just attended a baby shower where we played some games and this one was where we had to put the bowl on our head and scoop up cotton balls with a blindfold on.  So here I am in all my glory. 

I'll post more later.

1st day of my Juice Fast Journey!

I slept in today because it's Sunday and I don't have to work...well and I love to sleep!

When I woke, I weighed myself and then drank a 16 oz glass of hot water with lemon and chased it with a 16 oz cup of ice water.  While I was waiting about 20 minutes to juice my breakfast:
     3 Carrots
     2 Apples
     1" of Ginger root

I measured myself.  Here are my beginning day stats:

8/12/12 - First day of juice fast

Weight - 279.2 lbs (yikes) but I am down 6 lbs since I cut soda out and started eating more fruits and veggies
Waist - 54"
Bust - 52"
Hips - 56"
Thighs - 25"
Calves - 18.5"
Arms - 15"
Neck - 16.5"

Man! those are some big numbers.  I'm going to shrink them down to where they need to be!

It's the first time I've used my juicer which I bought used because I don't really have the funds to purchase new.  It left quite a bit of 'pulp' but it wasn't too bad.  I liked my breakfast drink but next time I will cut down on the ginger.

I drank 2 16 oz glasses of ice water and worked around the house a little bit then juiced my lunch

     1 Cucumber
     7 Kale Leaves
     2 Apples
     1/2 lemon
     1/2" of Ginger
     4 Celery stalks

Either I didn't juice them in the right order or my juicer just doesn't like Kale.  I've read a couple of forums and commentors indicated it should give about 36 - 40 ounces. My juicer gave me about 24 :(

I haven't had a problem with the juices so far being able to actually drink them.  I think I like the Green juice more than the breakfast juice. 

So far no adverse effects and I haven't had any withdrawals...but it is only the first day.

Happy Juicing!

Tomorrow is the big day...

Check back tomorrow night for my first day post.  It will include all kinds of cool stuff like my measurements and starting weight.  I'm going tonight after work to buy all the fruits and veggies I'll need for a few days as I don't want to venture out the first couple of days. 

Super Excited to begin my journey!

**UPDATE**

I stopped by the farm stand in town and picked up most of the things to start my juice fast:

2 bunches of Kale
4 Cucumbers
8 Roma Tomatoes
8 Donut Peaches
Ginger Root
4 Bell peppers
1 Bunch of Cilantro
5 lbs of carrots
8 Jonogold Apples
2 Golden Delicious Apples
2 Large Cantelope
4 Sweet Potatoes
4 lemons
2 bags of Spinich
1 lb of Strawberries

For $33.00!

I already had Celery and Grapes.  I also have some limes in the fridge.

I couldn't find Fennel bulb there but I think I have some ground fennel in the cabinet.  I know I should use fresh but if you can't find it you can't find it.  I saw some Jicama and I have heard that makes an awesome juice but I'll get thru these items first and go from there.

I'll post more tomorrow after I've had a juice or two

It's been a couple of days...

since I posted but there really isn't anything new to report.  I'm still super excited about the juice fast.  I wish I would have taken this week off!  But I'll wait until Sunday since I really don't know what to expect for the first few days of the fast.

I'm still trying to eat healthier.  The other day our boss bought pizza for us because we hit our quota for July.  I had 2 pieces and I could tell it!  I felt terrible all day.

Back to more fruits and veggies for me.  I found some awesome organic granola cereal at the local store this week.  It was pretty good.  My husband even liked it.

I bought some veggie burgers and stuck them in the freezer.  My husband thought they were regular burgers and cooked one.  He didn't realize until after he had cooked it that it was a veggie burger.  He said it stuck to the pan a little bit and thought he would check the fat content on the package.  He almost didn't eat it but thought he had already cooked it.  His verdict was 'it wasn't bad, I would eat them again' ! that is quite the feat for him.  I'm glad he's trying to adopt the lifestyle with me tho and I'm not hitting as much resistance as I thought I would.

I'll be back on Sunday - day 1 of my 5 day juice fast.

Doctor Appointment

Today was my doctor appointment to talk to my doctor about the results of my blood panel and about the juice fast.

First off he did all the normal doctor stuff.  Asked me some questions.  Checked my breathing and heart beat.  Felt for swollen lymph nodes and the such.  Then we discussed my blood panel.  It wasn't bad but it wasn't great either.

     Potassium was high
     Glucose was at prediabetic levels 106 (it should be <100)
     Triglycerides(256) were very high but overall Cholesterol(181) wasn't bad.
     HDL (38) was low and LDL (94) was normal.
     Vitamin D was still very low.  I tested about a year ago and it was 7.  I started taking a supplement everyday and it tested this time at 12.  It should be 30 so the doctor prescribed 50,000 units per week.

With some trepidation I approached the subject and asked him if he had seen the documentary Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead.  His reply was No but he had heard of it.  I went on to explain how Joe had an autoimmune disease and that after about 14 days the symptoms had disappeared and he was able to lower his dosage.  He said that he has a patient who is juicing but he didn't do a fast.  He juices for breakfast and lunch and for dinner he has a balanced normal meal.  He's lost about 60 lbs and said he feels great.  I said great, I would like to do a 5 day fast and hopefully, it will turn into a longer.  The doctor was very supportive of a juice fast and said that as long as I stopped doing the fast if I started feeling bad he would monitor it.  I told him that the first week would probably not be pretty but after that it should smooth out.  I have an appointment to see him on the 27th so he can see how things are going.

I mentioned that I had stopped eating as much meat.  I had dropped soda from my diet and I was eating more fruits and vegetables.  I also mentioned to him that I didn't think animal proteins were very good for us.  He said that he wasn't going to go there because he did think some animal proteins were ok but there should definitely be a limit. 

He knows my history and that I've tried every diet under the sun.  I told him that I really didn't want to do surgery, that I wanted to try to do this without medical intervention if at all possible.  He did say that he is an advocate for weight loss surgery in some individuals.  He usually suggests bariatric or the sleeve.  He doesn't like LapBand.  I just don't want to do any of them.  5 days til my juice fast.  Yes I'm lookin forward to this!

7 Days and counting

I start my juice fast on Sunday.  I have a doctors appointment tomorrow to get the results of my blood panel and to ask the doctor how he feels about a juice fast.  Regardless I will do it but I just want him to weigh in with his thoughts.

I've still been eating ok and haven't had any soda.  Last night I had a vegetarian pizza and it was really good.  It had cheese so it wasn't vegan but there was no meat.

I'm a work in progress!

Day 7 and other stuff

Today is day 7 without soda.  I had no headache today at all.  I'm extremely excited about that.  I know that with my juice fast coming up my body is going to be detoxifying and I'm really glad that I already have the caffiene thing out of my system!

Today I felt extremely self conscious about my appearance.  I really hate the skin I'm wearing and can't wait to start this juice fast.  I've already lost a few pounds just changing some of the things I eat and not drinking the soda anymore.  I've pretty much cut out all dairy.  I eat meat less per week and I'm eating more fresh fruits and veggies and more organic and whole non-processed foods.  I haven't had any junk food since I decided to do the juice fast.  I think that will make it easier to do the actual fast as well. 

8 days until the juice fast begins.  I might be a little more lax on posting until then.

Happier about my decision and hoping this will kick start an actual midlife change for me

On the road to a healthier fitter me

Day 6 and getting closer to my Juice Fast

Today is day 6 of no soda and I can honestly say that I keep having to talk myself out of going out to the vending machine.  I really really reallly want a Diet Dr. Pepper.  I hate not having control.  But I've stopped myself so far. 

I'm getting totally excited about having some time off of work and starting my juice fast.  I'm really hoping I can last longer than 5 days.  I'm hoping that it turns into at least a 30 day fast and we'll go from there.  I just wish I could talk the husband into doing this with me. 

I'm going to watch Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead and Forks Over Knives again tonight.  And I'm going to take notes this time.  I've seen them both a couple of times but as I stated earlier, I always get something new from them each time I re-watch them. 

I'm super excited!  Did I say that already?  I think I did.

More tomorrow.  Hopefully my craving for soda will subside by then.

Soon to be healthy and fit!

Day 5 No Soda

GAH!!! Yesterday was so hectic.  It was day 4 of no soda and I had service calls all day. I didn't get to eat right and I pigged out when I got home.  I will have to figure out a solution for days like this. I really really wanted to stop and buy a soda but refrained. 

I had a mild headache all day and I'm sure that is from lack of caffiene and lack of food. 

Today I've had a headache all day but it's not as bad as yesterday.  I'm stuck in the shop all day.  Maybe more later.